2009年6月英語六級考前熱點(diǎn)高分范文(八)

　　Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic On Dieting. You should write at least 150 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:

　　1)現(xiàn)在有越來越多人的選擇節(jié)食，有的人是為了健康，但是更多的人是為了有一個苗條的身材

　　2)分析節(jié)食減肥可能帶來的影響

　　3)你的建議

　　On Dieting

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　　行文思路

　　本題屬于提綱式文字命題。提綱第1點(diǎn)指出一種現(xiàn)象并要求說明原因，提綱第2點(diǎn)要求分析這種現(xiàn)象可能帶來的影響，提綱第3點(diǎn)要求針對該現(xiàn)象提出“我”的建議，由此可判斷本文應(yīng)為現(xiàn)象解釋型作文。

　　根據(jù)所給提綱，本文應(yīng)包含如下內(nèi)容：描述越來越多的人節(jié)食的現(xiàn)象并分析主要原因;闡述節(jié)食不當(dāng)可能帶來的影響;針對節(jié)食給出“我”的建議。

　　高分范文

　　On Dieting

　　Nowadays more and more people are beginning to go on a diet. Some people are concerned with their health, and they go on a diet in order to lose unwanted weight. But still others, [1]especially the young women, are paying too much attention to their outward appearance. They [2]become the leading numbers who go on a diet.

　　[3]However, dieting might [4]bring great negative effects on people. [3]For one thing, quite a lot of people don’t really need dieting to keep health, and they diet just because they want to keep slim. For them, dieting [5]not only is useless but also might damage their health. [3]For another, some people lack enough knowledge on how to diet scientifically. [3]As a result, they are likely to suffer from malnutrition.

　　[6]Considering the serious damage of unhealthy dieting, we should be cautious in dieting. [3]In my opinion, dieting,[7]for whatever reasons, needs professional guidance. [8]Only with right guidance can dieting work [9]as we expect.

　　【亮點(diǎn)點(diǎn)評】

　　[1]“尤其”，表示強(qiáng)調(diào)。

　　[2]“成為主力軍”。

　　[3]過渡銜接詞語，使文章條理清晰、銜接緊密。

　　[4]用于引出對危害或負(fù)面影響的闡述。