名師指導(dǎo)：如何改寫英語四級(jí)寫作范文

　　考生如何利用考場(chǎng)下的300分鐘、3000分鐘甚至30000分鐘，合理充分地準(zhǔn)備四級(jí)寫作，從而能夠輕松自如地應(yīng)對(duì)考場(chǎng)上的30分鐘呢?

　　在復(fù)習(xí)準(zhǔn)備四級(jí)寫作時(shí)，我們應(yīng)該按照“謀篇、段落、句子、措辭”(如圖一)“四步走”的宏觀復(fù)習(xí)方式來準(zhǔn)備。我們應(yīng)該將以往的范文作為框架，從謀篇布局著手，加以潤色字詞句的修飾，將其變成自己的四級(jí)高分作文。

　　學(xué)習(xí)范文或掌握優(yōu)秀作文是打破提高自己傳統(tǒng)寫作語言的第一步。下面我們通過2005年12月四級(jí)范文，分析學(xué)習(xí)如何提純范文中的“謀篇、段落、句子、措辭”并加以利用，使其變成自己的語言。

　　Should the University Campus Be Open to Tourist?

　　1. 名校校園正成為旅游新熱點(diǎn)

　　2. 校園是否應(yīng)對(duì)游客開放，人們看法不同

　　3. 我認(rèn)為…

Should the University Campus Be Open to Tourists?

　　Nowadays, many famous university campuses have become one of the popular tourist attractions. It has been shown on TV and on the radio that every year thousands and thousands of middle school students visit Tsing Hua University and Peking University and other famous universities in China. In the place far away from the capital city, the local students also visit the universities famous in their own province.

　　So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to open the university campus for tourists? Different people have different opinions. On one hand, some people argued that it is a good thing for the students to visit the famous university campus in that it can enable the middle students to get more information about the university and they can have enough time and opportunity to prepare themselves with the chance to get into the university. On the other hand, some people hold a negative view about this phenomenon. In their opinion, the public tourism will have negative effect on the universities because it will not only do harm to the environment but also to the intellectual atmosphere.

　　In my opinion, the tourism to the universities is not a good thing. The campus is mainly a place for study. With the increasing tourism on the campus, it will ruin the spiritual atmosphere in this learning field.

　　首先，提純范文 “謀篇布局”及結(jié)構(gòu)模板。

　　第一段：提出問題或現(xiàn)象。Nowadays, … … have become one of the popular … …. It has been shown on TV and on the radio that … ….

　　第二段：正反列舉人們的看法。So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to … …? Different people have different opinions. On one hand, some people argued that it is a good thing for … … in that … …. On the other hand, some people hold a negative view about this phenomenon. In their opinion, … … will have negative effect on … … because it will not only do harm to … … but also to … ….

　　第三段：擺明自己觀點(diǎn)。In my opinion, … … is not a good thing. … … With the increasing … …, it will ruin … ….

　　其次，提純范文“段落寫作”。

　　段落寫作分為統(tǒng)一性，連貫性和完整性三方面。

　　統(tǒng)一性(unity)：段落開頭的主題句應(yīng)該做到不可太寬泛，也不可太具體，做到有較強(qiáng)的概括性才能使下文做到有的放矢的展開。范文第二段首句以設(shè)問的方式提出一個(gè)問題is it a good or bad thing就有很強(qiáng)的概況性。下文自然會(huì)一方面從好的方面說明，另一方面從壞的方面說明。

　　連貫性(coherence)：關(guān)聯(lián)詞是使文章段落之間相互連貫的必要條件。范文中nowadays, on one hand, on the other hand, in one’s opinion即以“啟承轉(zhuǎn)合”遞進(jìn)的順序是文章條理清晰，層層展開。

　　完整性(completeness)：以設(shè)問句“So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to open the university campus for tourists?”開頭，這是平時(shí)較少運(yùn)用的段落寫作方式——設(shè)問法�！癘n one hand … …. On the other hand, … ….”是段落寫作分類列舉法的典型用法。

　　再次，提純范文“句子寫作”。

　　1. It has been shown that … …

　　類似句型：It is known to us that … …

　　It is said that … …

　　It is reported that … …

　　It is controversial that … …

　　2. “… … Tsing Hua University and Peking University and other famous universities … …�！薄�—并列句。并列句是簡(jiǎn)單的復(fù)雜句。但其運(yùn)用方法并不簡(jiǎn)單，注意練習(xí)并接句的使用，會(huì)使句子顯的更加飽滿。

　　3. enable v. 使…能夠

　　I gave him full directions to enable him to find the house.

　　4. in that = because

　　表“因?yàn)椤钡倪B詞還有since, for, as，如：

　　The boy was absent because he was ill. = The boy was absent since he was ill.

　　此句以我們常用的人稱開頭，句式簡(jiǎn)單，我們可以通過把since提前改變句式，如：

　　Since the boy was ill, he was absent. 句式多樣化。

　　最后，提純范文“措辭”。

　　1. attraction n. 具有吸引力的事情。

　　2. thousands and thousands 成千上萬的

　　形容“多”的表達(dá)方法：millions and millions

　　a multitude of

　　a great deal of

　　a large amount of

　　plenty of

　　many a

　　3. “some people argued that … …”中的“argue”并不是“討論，辯論”的意思，而是“認(rèn)為”。

　　I argue that … …

　　I maintain that … …

　　I claim that … …

　　I insist that … … = I think that … …

　　I hold that … …

　　I assert that … …

　　I assume that … …

　　4. negative adj. 否定的，相反的

　　hold negative view = hold opposite opinions

　　5. phenomenon n. 現(xiàn)象

　　social phenomenon 社會(huì)現(xiàn)象

　　natural phenomenon 自然現(xiàn)象

　　6. intellectual adj. 聰明的= intelligent, bright, clever

　　(選詞策略：使用最近所學(xué)的單詞，如intellectual > intelligent > bright > clever)

　　在分析并掌握范文之后，我們需要運(yùn)用范文知識(shí)練習(xí)仿寫。筆者運(yùn)用2005年12月范文中的模板結(jié)構(gòu)仿寫了2006年12月的四級(jí)作文，以供參考：

　　1. 許多人喜歡在除夕夜看春節(jié)晚會(huì)

　　2. 但有些人提出取消春節(jié)晚會(huì)

　　3. 我的看法

　　Nowadays, the Spring Festival Evening has become one of the popular topic and attractions during every traditional New Year’s Eve. It has been shown on TV and on the radio that every year thousands and thousands of Chinese people appear to be accustomed to enjoying the sights and sounds of a brilliant feast, while gathering with their beloved family.

　　However, an increasing number of people have voiced different opinions towards it. So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to cancel the Spring Festival Evening? Different people have different opinions. On one hand, some people argued that it is a good thing to amuse the audience in that it is composed by a numerous adequate programs, such as the emotional song, the graceful dance, the funny short sketch, the amusing comic dialogue, the delightful magic, and the marvelous acrobatics and so on. On the other hand, some people hold a negative view about this phenomenon. In their opinion, the Spring Festival Evening will have negative effect on the family harmony because it will not only do harm to having the talks between family members on the Spring Festival Eve but also to enjoying the gourmet meal in a fancy restaurant.

　　In my opinion, the Spring Festival Evening is a good thing. It may not remain a must for all people, but it can bring us a strong sense of festivity and serve as an alternative among the variety of holiday activities. With the increasing audience of the Spring Festival Evening, it will ruin a distinctive culture during the Spring Festival vacation.

　　寄語：分析范文或優(yōu)秀作文是我們學(xué)好寫作的第一步。不要小看任何的優(yōu)秀小短文，那其中一定有需要你掌握的內(nèi)容。

　　To see a world in a grain of sand,
　　And a heaven in a wild flower,
　　Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
　　And eternity in an hour.

　　一沙一世界，
　　一花一天堂，
　　手中即無限，
　　永恒亦短暫。

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