Direction 23
Study the following picture carefully and write an essay in which you should:
1. describe the picture;
2. interpret the meaning of the picture;
3. make your comments.
You should write 160~200 words neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2.
審題：
這道題的出題方式我們已遇到多次了，是“描述圖畫(huà)+闡釋含義+作出評(píng)論”的模式，這種模式在寫(xiě)作中的靈活程度比較大。
Sample:
In the picture, a young man asks an old man, “What can be got without pains in this world?” The old man replies, “There is only one thing: poverty.”
Looking at the drawing, I think a lot. It tells us that we have to make strenuous efforts whenever we want to be successful in a particular field. How can a person achieve his ultimate goal without longtime practices and continuous attempts?
A good case in point is mountaineering. Nobody is born a good mountain climber, and one can only become a skilled one after countless injuries. The scenery at the mountaintop is fantastic, but the road to the summit is always rough and full of hardships and dangers. Isn’t scientific research the same? Countless sleepless nights, thousands of failures and even more—all of these are part of a scientist’s life. Only a few of them can make great scientific breakthroughs, and all of these people are the most persevering.
On the contrary, if a person is determined to live an idle life, and wait for God to put something in his hands, then that thing should and could only be poverty. If a person has neither ideal nor the determination to live better and let others live better, his existence is not meaningful at all.
點(diǎn)評(píng)：
這篇文章共分四段：首段是描述圖畫(huà)；次段是總結(jié)寓意；第三段是舉例說(shuō)明；第四段是下結(jié)論。該文最引人注目之處是第三個(gè)段落，整段舉了兩個(gè)例子。我們?cè)诙嗄甑目佳虚喚碇邪l(fā)現(xiàn)，大多數(shù)同學(xué)的舉例是不成功的。舉例子要具備兩個(gè)條件才能成功，一是典型——既要緊扣主題，又要具有代表性，能夠震撼人心，切忌不痛不癢；二是精練——用簡(jiǎn)潔的話語(yǔ)表達(dá)深刻的意義，切忌拖泥帶水。本文第三段在這點(diǎn)上很值得學(xué)習(xí)。
文章第一段非常簡(jiǎn)潔。第二段的首句是過(guò)渡性的句子，次句直接對(duì)圖畫(huà)的意義做出總結(jié)——無(wú)論我們想在哪個(gè)領(lǐng)域獲得成功，都必須付出艱辛的努力。接著采用了語(yǔ)氣非常強(qiáng)烈的反問(wèn)句——沒(méi)有長(zhǎng)時(shí)間的實(shí)踐和不斷的努力，一個(gè)人又怎能實(shí)現(xiàn)最終的目標(biāo)？第三段包括了兩個(gè)例子，一個(gè)是登山，一個(gè)是科學(xué)研究。第四段是結(jié)尾段落，首先與第三段是相對(duì)的，其次又呼應(yīng)了文章的首段，非常精妙。該段共有兩句話，第一句話說(shuō)如果一個(gè)人下定決心要過(guò)閑散的生活，等著上天在他手中放上某樣?xùn)|西，那么這樣?xùn)|西就只能是貧窮。第二句話進(jìn)一步說(shuō)，如果一個(gè)人既沒(méi)有理想也沒(méi)有決心讓自己和別人過(guò)得更好，那么他的存在就失去了意義。第二句話與第一句采用了同樣的句式，語(yǔ)氣卻更加強(qiáng)烈，給人留下了很深刻的印象。該段第一句話中的should and could be...是一個(gè)高級(jí)用法，意思是“將會(huì)是而且只能是”。
心得：
我們重點(diǎn)來(lái)看一下舉例的段落，即第三段。該段共有六句話。第一句話引出了登山。第二句話是一個(gè)經(jīng)典句子，沒(méi)有人生來(lái)就是一個(gè)好的登山者，一個(gè)人只有在無(wú)數(shù)傷痛后才能成長(zhǎng)起來(lái)——該句的內(nèi)在邏輯聯(lián)系非常強(qiáng)。第三句話說(shuō)山頂?shù)娘L(fēng)光綺麗，但通往頂點(diǎn)的路卻充滿艱辛（句中有平行名詞的用法）。第四句話采用反問(wèn)句巧妙過(guò)渡到科學(xué)研究上來(lái)。第五句先用平行的名詞詞組，而后在破折號(hào)后寫(xiě)道“所有這些都是科學(xué)家生活的一部分”相當(dāng)獨(dú)特。注意句中part一定不要加冠詞。最后一句寫(xiě)道，他們中只有一小部分人能取得重大的科學(xué)突破，而這些人又都是最堅(jiān)忍之人。
請(qǐng)大家仔細(xì)學(xué)習(xí)這一段落。一是該段的構(gòu)建方法，看句子與句子是怎樣有機(jī)結(jié)合，層層推進(jìn)，構(gòu)成一個(gè)理想的段落的。二是學(xué)習(xí)本段的舉例方法。例子是用來(lái)說(shuō)明道理的，如果能說(shuō)到點(diǎn)子上，說(shuō)得透徹，就一定能服人。
