貢獻(xiàn)：國內(nèi)大學(xué)英語考試輔導(dǎo)專家，具有豐富的考試輔導(dǎo)經(jīng)驗(yàn)。在教學(xué)上精益求精，激情洋溢，有高度的責(zé)任心�，F(xiàn)已出版多部英語專著，“黃金模板”系列更居同類圖書榜首。在蘇、浙、滬等地多所大學(xué)授課，深受學(xué)生歡迎。恩波學(xué)校六級(jí)網(wǎng)站版主，第一位在網(wǎng)上為全國學(xué)生免費(fèi)批改作文的老師，也是目前全國批改作文最多的老師。
Directions1
Study the following pictures carefully and write an essay in which you should:
1. describe the two pictures,
2. interpret their meaning, and
3. point out the reasons for such phenomenon.
You should write 160~200 words neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2.
審題：
這道題包含兩幅對(duì)比鮮明的圖畫，指令要求在描述圖畫后闡明含義并給出該現(xiàn)象的原因。我們應(yīng)該這樣來構(gòu)造全文：第一段描述圖畫；第二段發(fā)表自己對(duì)圖畫的看法；第三段給出該現(xiàn)象的原因；第四段下結(jié)論，簡(jiǎn)要提出解決問題的辦法。經(jīng)過學(xué)習(xí)之后，大家就會(huì)知道這是一個(gè)極為重要的模式，請(qǐng)大家用心掌握。
Sample:
As is depicted by the two pictures, a sharp contrast is shaped between the parents and the son. In the left drawing, the parents are working hard in the field, bending over and sweating heavily. Near them is a basket with very simple food in it. However, in the right drawing, their son is squandering the money on luxurious food and chatting on mobile phone.
How pitiful the parents are! They spare no efforts to earn money in order to support their son’s study and life in university. They seem to be willing to do everything that is helpful to their beloved son. But, in return, the son spends the money as he likes without knowing how hard his parents work for it and how he should use it to better prepare himself for future career.
In my opinion, the reasons for this phenomenon come down to one essential point—failure of both family and school education. For one thing, quite a lot of Chinese parents spoil their children. All parents’ love for children is the same, but different is the way of showing it. Many parents hope too much that their children will have a bright future, which, in their eyes, means key universities, hot majors, good salaries and so on. So they try their best to satisfy the children’s demands instead of teaching them to struggle for future with their own hands. For another, centered on exam marks, the school education also fails, to a large extent, to impart moral standards to the children, especially the conception of selfreliance and hard struggle.
In a word, to change the phenomenon described by the above pictures, a reform in our current education system is not only necessary but urgent.
點(diǎn)評(píng)：
第一段的重點(diǎn)是在描述時(shí)突出兩幅圖畫之間強(qiáng)烈的反差，所以這里專門加上了第一句話。這一段在用詞上也很考究。第二段強(qiáng)烈地表達(dá)了自己的感想。首句使用了感嘆句。而后先說父母竭盡全力掙錢供孩子讀書，后說孩子不知父母辛苦，不懂得如何正確利用父母的血汗錢。第三段給出了該現(xiàn)象的原因——家庭和學(xué)校教育的失敗，而后分為兩方面來說，結(jié)構(gòu)極為清晰。最后一段只有一句話，擲地有聲——要想改變現(xiàn)狀，只能改革當(dāng)前的教育體系。
心得：
全文一氣呵成，讀來倍感暢快。從描述圖畫，到發(fā)表評(píng)論，到給出原因，再到解決辦法，可謂渾然一體。既有全局的考慮，又有細(xì)微處語言的運(yùn)用，該文值得大家細(xì)細(xì)品味。
