Directions 9
Study the following picture carefully and write an essay in which you should:
1. describe the picture,
2. point out the reasons for this phenomenon, and
3. give possible solutions.
You should write 160~200 words neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2.
審題：
這篇文章的提綱是圖畫作文另一種非常典型的提綱，在描述圖畫后分別給出該現(xiàn)象（或問(wèn)題）的原因及其解決辦法。這里在提綱中雖沒(méi)有出現(xiàn)interpret the meaning（闡釋含義）的字樣，實(shí)際上這個(gè)步驟是不可少的，但可以做得極為簡(jiǎn)潔。
Sample:
In this picture we are surprised to see a group of fat children who want to lose weight at a dieting center. We can’t help asking such a question: why are there so many overweighted young children in present society?
In my belief, many reasons contribute to this undesirable result, but three of them play the dominant role. In the first place, with the development of national economy, people’s living level becomes higher and higher. Grandparents and parents devote all their love to the young children, who consequently often take in much more nutrition than necessary. In the second place, more and more young boys and girls are even addicted to foreign snacks, which contain too much fat and thus do great harm to the heart and the vessels. Last but by no means the least, pressure from teachers, parents and the whole society often leaves little time for small children to take part in physical exercises.
To solve this worrying problem, all of us should take immediate and effective measures. First, a balanced and healthy diet is often the most important factor in the making of a strong body. In this aspect, teachers and parents should do their jobs. Second, exercises should become part of their daily life—once children get used to sports, they will find it not only beneficial but also interesting.
All of us have realized the children are the future of our nation, and we should also realize that healthy minds always dwell in healthy bodies. To fulfill this goal, all of us should work hard.
點(diǎn)評(píng)：
該文章仍然是四個(gè)段落。第一段非常引人注目，只用了一句話便完成了對(duì)圖畫的描寫，還加入了表達(dá)作者心情的部分（be surprised to see）。段落中的第二句話非常關(guān)鍵，是將圖畫總結(jié)為一個(gè)大家都該來(lái)關(guān)注的社會(huì)問(wèn)題——兒童的肥胖問(wèn)題。第二句話的作用相當(dāng)于對(duì)畫圖人意圖的測(cè)度，只不過(guò)由于提綱的要求，這里沒(méi)有單獨(dú)成段，而是放到了第一段。
第二段與第三段嚴(yán)格按照提綱來(lái)寫，分別寫原因和解決辦法，段落的首句都是非常精彩的模板句。第二段首句的寫法請(qǐng)大家用心揣摩——既顯得全面（句子的前半部分），又不失重點(diǎn)（句子的后半部分）。該段之后分為三點(diǎn)來(lái)寫，第一點(diǎn)兩句話由淺入深，脈絡(luò)清晰。先寫隨著國(guó)民經(jīng)濟(jì)的發(fā)展，人民生活水平提高了——這句話是常常用到的經(jīng)典句子，大家應(yīng)熟練掌握。然后寫祖父母和父母將愛(ài)都傾注在孩子們身上，導(dǎo)致孩子們常常營(yíng)養(yǎng)過(guò)剩。該句中大家應(yīng)首先掌握非限制性定語(yǔ)從句的寫法，該從句的拓展性非常好，能避免連寫句（runon sentence）這樣的常見錯(cuò)誤。之后大家應(yīng)學(xué)習(xí)詞組devote...to...和more than necessary的用法。第二點(diǎn)講越來(lái)越多的孩子沉溺于洋快餐。注意句中be addicted to和非限制性定語(yǔ)從句的用法。句中有一個(gè)難詞thus（副詞），這里表示結(jié)果。第三點(diǎn)講述了孩子缺乏鍛煉的原因——該句使用了特殊的句型結(jié)構(gòu)，有助于我們拓展思路，注意學(xué)習(xí)leave little/no time for someone to do something的結(jié)構(gòu)。
第三段分兩點(diǎn)來(lái)說(shuō)解決問(wèn)題的辦法。第一點(diǎn)說(shuō)平衡健康的飲食是至關(guān)重要的，這句話中的making是個(gè)閃光點(diǎn)，表示“造就……的過(guò)程”。后面一句中的do ones jobs等于take on ones responsibility。第二點(diǎn)中使用了破折號(hào)，后面是時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句，注意get used to(習(xí)慣于)和not only...but also...的用法。句子中出現(xiàn)了part的用法，注意這里不能加冠詞，否則不僅不能加分，還要扣分。再舉一例，大家細(xì)細(xì)體會(huì)：
Learn the phrase by heart until it becomes part of you.
這是表達(dá)效果很強(qiáng)的用法，文中的句子表示體育鍛煉應(yīng)成為他們?nèi)粘Ｉ畹囊徊糠郑馑际浅蔀榱艘环N習(xí)慣。上面這句話表示將該詞組熟記以至于永遠(yuǎn)熟練掌握。
最后一段使用了強(qiáng)勢(shì)的推導(dǎo)方式，先找到對(duì)方（讀者）認(rèn)同的基本觀點(diǎn)（孩子是國(guó)家的未來(lái)），而后推導(dǎo)出文中的重要觀點(diǎn)（健康的心靈存在于健康的體魄）。第二句將目的狀語(yǔ)放在句首，我們要做的工作放在后面，非常簡(jiǎn)潔。
心得：
對(duì)提綱的把握非常關(guān)鍵，我們應(yīng)該做到看到提綱后立即對(duì)文章全文的構(gòu)造有個(gè)全面的想法。
末段呼應(yīng)前文的方式多種多樣，不一定是嚴(yán)格地將文章中所述的思想再簡(jiǎn)單地重復(fù)一遍。
對(duì)于文章中的詞組和句型，好的學(xué)習(xí)方法是將它們摘錄下來(lái)，反復(fù)地進(jìn)行多感官操練（眼、耳、口、手、心并用），這樣我們的學(xué)習(xí)效率就能大大提高了。
